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What I watched in… February 2014
In the interest of full disclosure (and to generate a little content here) I thought I’d present a regular tally of what movies I managed to see in the previous month. Some of them I’ve written about, most of them I haven’t. This list includes movies I saw for the first time, movies I’ve seen a thousand times, movies I saw in the theater, movies I watched at home, direct-to-DVD, made-for-TV and anything else that qualifies as a movie. Feel free to discuss or ask about any of them!
I should note that this February featured the Winter Olympics, a period during which my movie-watching crawls to virtually nothing. If the Olympics are on, that’s the only thing on my TV. Go, curling.
1. Drew: The Man Behind the Poster (2013), A-
2. Soultaker (1990), D; MST3K Riff, B
3. Laserblast (1978), F; MST3K Riff, B
4. Night of the Lepus (1972), D; RiffTrax, B+
5. Night of the Living Dead (1968), A; RiffTrax, B-
6. The LEGO Movie (2014), A-
What I Watched in… January 2014
In the interest of full disclosure (and to generate a little content here) I thought I’d present a regular tally of what movies I managed to see in the previous month. Some of them I’ve written about, most of them I haven’t. This list includes movies I saw for the first time, movies I’ve seen a thousand times, movies I saw in the theater, movies I watched at home, direct-to-DVD, made-for-TV and anything else that qualifies as a movie. Feel free to discuss or ask about any of them!
1. Muppets From Space (1999), B
2. The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters (2007), A
3. Bill Cosby: Far From Finished (2013), B+
4. Daleks’ Invasion Earth 2150 A.D. (1966), D; RiffTrax Riff, B
5. The Wizard of Oz (1939), A; RiffTrax Riff, B+
6. Rocketship X-M (1950), D; MST3K Riff, B
7. Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief (2010), B
8. Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters (2013), B
9. Cinderella (1950), A
10. The Pod People (1983), F; MST3K Riff, B+
11. JLA Adventures: Trapped in Time (2014), B+
12. Godzilla, King of the Monsters (1956), B
13. Godzilla Versus the Sea Monster (1966), C; MST3K Riff, B
14. American Hustle (2013), B+
15. Stranded in Space (1973), D-; MST3K Riff, B-
16. Revenge of the Creature (1955), C; MST3K Riff, B-
17. Where the Toys Come From (1984), C-
18. Lincoln (2012), A-
19. 21 & Over (2013), C
20. The Incredible Burt Wonderstone (2013), C
21. Bronies: The Extremely Unexpected Adult Fans of My Little Pony (2012), B-
22. Jedi Junkies (2010), B
23. Lovelace (2013), C-
24. Big Trouble in Little China (1986), A-
25. King Kong (1933), A
26. King Kong Vs. Godzilla (1962), B
What I watched in… September 2013
In the interest of full disclosure (and to generate a little content here) I thought I’d present a regular tally of what movies I managed to see in the previous month. Some of them I’ve written about, most of them I haven’t. This list includes movies I saw for the first time, movies I’ve seen a thousand times, movies I saw in the theater, movies I watched at home, direct-to-DVD, made-for-TV and anything else that qualifies as a movie. Feel free to discuss or ask about any of them!
1. Castle Freak (1995), F
2. The Lost Skeleton Returns Again (2009), B-
3. Tourist Trap (1979), D; RiffTrax Riff, B+
4. Parts: The Clonus Horror (1979), F; MST3K Riff, B
5. The Iron Giant (1999), A+
6. Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (1992), D
7. Incident at Loch Ness (2004), B+
8. Upside Down (2012), C
9. This Island Earth (1955), C+
10. Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie (1996), B+
11. Pocahontas (1995), C-
12. The Host (2013), D+
13. Riddick (2013), D-
14. Rocky (1976), A
15. World War Z (2013), B-
16. Hellraiser: Bloodline (1996), D
17. The Touch of Satan (1971), F; MST3K Riff, B
18. Room 237 (2012), B+
19. 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968), A
20. Escape From Planet Earth (2013), B
Fun with Riffing
Once upon a time, there was a thing called the “Cable Ace Awards.” It was basically the Emmys for cable TV. They stopped giving them out about the same time HBO started winning all of the real Emmys, at which point they realized there was no longer any reason for the Ace Awards to exist, showing the sort of self-awareness the MPAA can only dream of. As far as I’m concerned, there’s only one lasting contribution the Ace Awards made to modern society: they’re responsible for my introduction to Mystery Science Theater 3000. One year, whichever network was broadcasting the awards showed a bunch of the nominated shows over a weekend, including an episode of MST3K. As my parents’ cable provider did not, at that time, carry Comedy Central, I’d never seen an episode before. I stumbled upon the image of a guy and two robots in a darkened theater cracking jokes about a terrible 50s-era monster movie, the sort that local TV channels still showed all weekend even then. I was instantly mesmerized, but it would be about two years before our local cable got Comedy Central and I was given my real entryway into becoming a hardcore MSTie for life.
MST3K went away many years ago, of course, but it has its spiritual successors, my favorite of which is RiffTrax. The RiffTrax crew consists of Michael J. Nelson, Bill Corbett, and Kevin Murphy – essentially the second cast of MST3K. They’re doing the same job as before, making fun of movies, but now they do it through video on demand you can download from their website or buy on DVD, MP3 commentary riffs for blockbuster movies that you can synch and watch on your own, and a few times a year, live riffs of movies they perform in front of an audience and broadcast to movie theaters across America. Last night, I went to the first RiffTrax Live event I’ve had the chance to attend – a Kickstarter-fueled riffing of director Paul Verhoven’s laughably bad sci-fi “satire” Starship Troopers. The riff was great, picking apart the movie mercilessly. Even several cast members, including Casper Van Dien, Clancy Brown, Jake Busey, and Neil Patrick Harris (who has joined Mike Nelson for riffs in the past) spread the word about the riffing, none of which particularly spared them from the crew’s jokes… although it should be noted that Denise Richards undoubtedly got the worst of their jabs, and she didn’t seem to have anything to do with promoting the riffing.
I’m not here to sell you on the riff, though – you can go to their website and download any of their riffs if you need convincing. What I loved about this, more than anything else, was the actual experience of watching the film. I went with my friends Kenny, Daniel and Lauren, all of whom have gone to RiffTrax Live shows before, and therefore knew a bit more about what to expect than I did. As we sat down, the screen rolled with what appeared to be the usual pre-movie spiel you get in any multiplex in America… but soon, the resounding laughter would make it clear even to the blind that this wasn’t just your ordinary stuff. Instead, it was RiffTrax-generated jokes. Anagrams that poked fun at recent summer blockbusters, “Movie Mistakes” gags that invariably turned into jokes about Casper Van Dien’s post-Troopers career, and so on. With each change of the scene there’d be quiet, then laughter.
In-between the new screens, though, the atmosphere was nothing like a usual movie theater, where disinterested strangers sit around chomping down their popcorn at best or yammering on their phone at worst. Instead, it was a sort of carnival atmosphere, full of people who came not just to watch a movie, but to have a good time. People roamed around, talking, chatting to strangers. There was a sort of unspoken promise that the general volume level would drop to read the preshow cards (even though there was no technical reason for it to do so), and a bizarre feeling of community. It was like everybody in the room was in on a joke that we knew the people wandering in and out of whatever Tyler Perry joint was soiling the adjacent theater would never understand.
Once the movie started, the conversation stopped, but not the noise. People laughed, people cheered, people applauded their favorite riffs. I don’t usually clap even in the best of movies, because it’s not like the actors can hear me. But when Mike Nelson dropped a fairly obvious gag at the expense of AT&T, it hit a sort of universal chord that made the theater almost explode with energy, and I found myself pounding my hands together along with everybody else.
Because I wasn’t just “at the movies,” like I am any other time, even when the best movies are on the screen. Years ago, the MST3K commercials included a line that was something like, “It’s like watching cheesy movies with three of your funniest friends.” Last night, I felt like I was in an entire theater full of friends who wanted to have a good time together.
They’re going to rebroadcast the Starship Troopers show on September 12, again in theaters across America. Then they’re coming back on October 24 to riff the granddaddy of the modern zombie film, Night of the Living Dead. I can’t wait to see that one too, and I intend to go to as many of these as I can from now on. In a world where even movie theaters are so often dens of misery, it’s great to know that for just a little while, you can stop in for some pure, untarnished fun.
What I Watched in… July 2013
In the interest of full disclosure (and to generate a little content here) I thought I’d present a regular tally of what movies I managed to see in the previous month. Some of them I’ve written about, most of them I haven’t. This list includes movies I saw for the first time, movies I’ve seen a thousand times, movies I saw in the theater, movies I watched at home, direct-to-DVD, made-for-TV and anything else that qualifies as a movie. Feel free to discuss or ask about any of them!
- Man of Steel (2013), A
- The Incredibles (2004), A
- Independence Day (1996), B+
- Brave (2012), A-
- Despicable Me (2010), B+
- Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi (1984), B+
- Flash Gordon (1980), D
- Howard the Duck (1986), D
- Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (1937), A
- Star Wars Vs. Star Trek: The Rivalry Continues (2004), F
- Lockout (2012), B-
- Q: The Winged Serpent (1982), C-
- Warm Bodies (2013), B
- Fangs of the Living Dead (1969), D; RiffTrax Riff, B
- The Deadly Bees (1967), D+; MST3K Riff, B+
- Monsters University (2013), A-
- That Guy… Who Was In That thing (2012), B+
- Pacific Rim (2012), B+
- Peter Pan (1953), B+
- The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra (2001), B-
- Godzilla (1954), B+
- Lethal Weapon (1987), B+
- Little Shop of Horrors (1986), A-
- Cloverfield (2008), B+
- Gamera (1965), C; MST3K Riff, A
- The Invisible Maniac (1990), F
- Gamera Vs. Barugon (1966), D; MST3K Riff, B+
- YellowBrickRoad (2010), C-
- Gamera Vs. Gaos (1967), D; MST3K Riff, B
- Gamera Vs. Guiron (1969), D; MST3K Riff, B+
- Gamera Vs. Zigra (1971), C-; MST3K Riff, B
- Sharknado (2013), F
- Chopping Mall (1986), F
- Lilo and Stitch (2002), B+
- Lilo and Stitch 2: Stitch has a Glitch (2005), B-
- Dave Barry’s Complete Guide to Guys (2005), B-
- Little Shop of Horrors (1960), D; RiffTrax, B+
- The Rubber Room (2013), B+
- The Dark Crystal (1982), B
- Dark City (1998), A
- Justice League: The Flashpoint Paradox (2013), A-
What I Watched In… April 2013
In the interest of full disclosure (and to generate a little content here) I thought I’d present a regular tally of what movies I managed to see in the previous month. Some of them I’ve written about, most of them I haven’t. This list includes movies I saw for the first time, movies I’ve seen a thousand times, movies I saw in the theater, movies I watched at home, direct-to-DVD, made-for-TV and anything else that qualifies as a movie. Feel free to discuss or ask about any of them!
- The Neverending Story (1984), B+
- John Dies at the End (2012), B+
- Hotel Transylvania (2012), C
- Seeking a Friend For the End of the World (2012), B+
- Ruby Sparks (2012), A
- Evil Dead (2013), A-
- Hitchcock (2012), B
- Plan 9 From Outer Space (1958), F; RiffTrax Riff, B
- Idiocracy (2006), B+
- Slumdog Millionaire (2008), A
- History of the World Part I (1981), A
- Buck Privates (1941), A-
- Abbott and Costello Meet Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1953), B-
- Kill Bill Vol. 1 (2003), B+
- Kill Bill Vol. 2 (2004), A-
- Pumaman (1980), D; MST3K Riff, B+
- Time Chasers (1994), D; MST3K Riff, B
- Merlin’s Shop of Mystical Wonders (1996), D-; MST3K Riff, B
- The Wizard of Oz (1925), D
- The Apple (1980), F; RiffTrax Riff, B
- Carnage (2011), B+
- Iron Man: Rise of Technovore (2013), C+
- Oblivion (2013), C+
- Midnight in Paris (2011), A-
- Who Framed Roger Rabbit? (1988), A
- Horse Feathers (1932), B
- Journey Back to Oz (1974), C-
- The Wiz (1978), B+
- Return to Oz (1985), B+
- Kingdom of the Spiders (1977), D; RiffTrax Riff, A-
- Condorman (1981), C+
- Reservoir Dogs (1992), B+
- Pulp Fiction (1995), A-
- The Galaxy Invader (1985), F; RiffTrax Riff, B
- The Matrix (1999), A-
- The Matrix Reloaded (2003), B
- The Matrix Revolutions (2003), B-
- Shame (2011), D+
- Tin Man (2007 Miniseries), B
- The Looney, Looney, Looney Bugs Bunny Movie (1981), B
- Tiny Toon Adventures: How I Spent My Vacation (1992), B-
- The Bugs Bunny/Road Runner Movie (1979), B
What I Watched In… March 2013
In the interest of full disclosure (and to generate a little content here) I thought I’d present a regular tally of what movies I managed to see in the previous month. Some of them I’ve written about, most of them I haven’t. This list includes movies I saw for the first time, movies I’ve seen a thousand times, movies I saw in the theater, movies I watched at home, direct-to-DVD, made-for-TV and anything else that qualifies as a movie. Feel free to discuss or ask about any of them!
1. Dreamer of Oz (1990), B
2. Lion of Oz (2000), C
3. The Boy in the Plastic Bubble (1976), D; Rifftrax, B
4. Wreck-It Ralph (2012), A
5. The Babysitters (2007), C
6. Batman (1943), C+
7. The Wonderful Galaxy of Oz (1990), D
8. Master of the Rings: The Unauthorized Story Behind J.R.R. Tolkien’s ‘Lord of the Rings’ (2001), C+
9. Tom and Jerry and the Wizard of Oz (2011), B-
10. Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971), A
11. Pure Imagination: The Story of ‘Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory’ (2001), B
12. Oz the Great and Powerful (2013), B+
13. Toy Story (1995), A
14. Batman: The Movie (1966), C
15. Batman (1989), B+
16. Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back (1980), A+
17. Frankenstein Island (1981), D; RiffTrax, B-
18. The Brute Man (1946), D-; MST3K Riff, B
19. Dick Tracy (1990), B
20. Future War (1997), F, MST3K Riff, B
21. Abbott and Costello Meet Captain Kidd (1952), C
22. The Invincible Iron Man (2007), C
23. Batman: Mask of the Phantasm (1993), A
24. When a Stranger Calls Back (1993), F; RiffTrax Riff, B+
25. The Dark Knight (2008), A
26. Africa Screams (1949), B-
27. Animal Crackers (1930), A-
28. Jack and the Beanstalk (1952), B
29. The House on Haunted Hill (1959), B-; RiffTrax Riff, B+
30. The Easter Bunny is Comin’ to Town (1977), B
31. Sophia the First: Once Upon a Princess (2012), B
32. It’s the Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown! (1974), B+
33. It’s Arbor Day, Charlie Brown (1976), B-
34. Ben-Hur (1959), A+
35. The Ten Commandments (1956), A+
36. Jack the Giant Killer (1962), C; Rifftrax Riff, B